कूच

मृत्यु सबको आती है

जीते बहुत हैं 

याद चंद किये जाते हैं  

और पीड़ा .. 

पीड़ा है सिर्फ तुमसे

तुम्हारे पारगमन से 

तुम्हारी कूच से 

15th August

Just felt like watching an Indian Flag Hoisting ceremony ...

Even though I am a self proclaimed - more patriotic than many, it always was a boring event for me back in the days.

I lived in a neighborhood where at least 4 schools(including mine of course) were within a distance of clear loudspeaker sound. I was always repelled by the high volumes, irrespective of the nicest melody being played.
Also, no matter how enthusiastically I practiced in bathroom, I would never think it was good enough for the stage and mic! So days like these mostly started with a negative undertone for me.

To my relief, the ceremonies used to be over by noon or so and we were home around lunchtime. Sure enough there was some Karma/Tiranga/Shaheed type movie running on DD. So the rest of the day was the real freedom and fun for the kids that we were :).

The best part was - four Boondi laddus in primary school to one tiger biscuit packet in secondary to snacks in college.

Never thought I would miss this but here I am!

Happy Independence Day :-).

Motherhood

When I dropped her at day care today, she didn't cry. And even though I wanted her not to cry every time I dropped her there in the past, I didn't quite like it when this finally happened.

Today I realized that every time she cried going away from me , it gave me a sense of fulfillment.
Of course I felt shattered watching those tears rolling down her cheeks but the fact that she didn't like being away from her mom even when there were plenty of fun activities going around, just gave the mom-me an emotional boost.

However, today was a leap. It dreaded me for the day she would go to school, college and then someday she would move out and explore the world on her own.

Will I ever be ready for it?

#motherhood

बसंत

बारिश की धूप
गर्मियों वाली हवा

ना पूरा सुकून
ना मुकम्मल सज़ा

मखमल में लिपटी
खैरातों का अन्तर्द्वन्द

समझेगा शायद ये
बर्फ की चादर में लिपटा हुआ बसंत

Wanderer

When you cant solace

You distract

And distract more

When you cant bridge

You distance 

And distance more

When you stop believing 

You trust 

And trust more

The thing about these
Pauses...
Dilemmas...
Incompleteness...

Is ...

You wander
All  The  More.